Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Subs for two weeks

Because of an incredibly secret prior engagement, I will be turning over the reins for two weeks to DJs Lillian (or possibly Rob) and Manos. Since there are so many thousands of you following this blog, please give me your feedback. Were their pants tight enough? Did they slack off, perhaps leaving the top snaps undone, letting their guts hang out? Did they just blow it off entirely, arriving in worn out green sweats and Uggs? Or did they breathe new life into Friday afternoons on WCBN, in the form-fittingest pair of Levi's 511s available? Let me know.

I hope you'll call and harass them on the telephone. You don't call me enough. Usually I am pleased not to have to answer the phone, since I'm busy playing "pong" on faceweb and checking my text-mail. Occasionally, I long for the affirmation that comes with my fleeting chats with you as you call and ask me to play The Offspring. If I could, I would play nothing but Van Halen and Led Zeppelin all afternoon, but unfortunately, the program director is a seething asshole so I can't. Someday I'll start my own radio station just for you all.

I'll be with you this Friday, October first, urging you to go to the free Japanese film at the Askwith auditorium, and the non-free Italian horror film on Saturday at the Michigan Theater. These are things worth doing in Ann Arbor, so I hope you'll take advantage. Then I'll be taking a break to apply for clown school on Fridays, October 8 and 15. See you when I see you.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Pontiac: we build excitement!

I can't help it but every time we drive to Pontiac for a rock & roll show, that 1980s ad jingle runs through my head. Pontiac is so depressing it needs a song like this. Last night we decided we should return to Pontiac in the morning (or just stay overnight) so we could hit this fish fry at a church on one of the state-named streets. The fish fry starts at 11am and goes all day, Thursdays and Fridays! Then on Saturdays, there is a place right downtown where you can get all-you-can-eat pancakes! Then of course there's the pawnshop with a display window that defies description. You have to see it for yourself.

So last night we went to see Shellac at the Crofoot. It's the first time in 15 years I've seen them (unless they were at the Touch & Go party in 2005, but I just can't remember) so it was cool for old time's sake. They look and sound exactly the same, having been crystallized or waxed or whatever back in 1995. They also still do the Q & A between songs. However there were fewer references to Canada and none to ventriloquists, so I guess they were a little different.

No offense if you are a member of Shellac or one of their affiliates- At Action Park is still one of my favorite records and I have nothing but respect for these guys- but blogging is a stupid waste of time anyway, empty chatter that fills up the infinite reaches of interwebspace, so what I'm saying is pretty inconsequential. Why are you even reading this? By the way, if you are, Todd Trainer is too cool for words.

Listen to WCBN-88.3fm in Ann Arbor for a pretty subdued radio station ID from Steve Albini. I don't know what we expected- "Hi there, kiddies, this is your old friend Steve and you're on the air with 88.3 megahertz WCBNFM Ann Arbor! Don't touch that dial or I'll say something really mean!"? Nah, I guess not.

WCBN is transitioning to its Fall schedule so if you're a student and somehow stumbled on this "blog", before you navigate away screaming, read this: we take students and mold them into dorky music snobs free of charge. Join us on Sunday afternoons at 4pm for introductory training in the basement of the Student Activities Building. Go to the WCBN web page for more instructions.

Monday, September 6, 2010

What's new in Tight Pants?

Well, there's this article. But actually, I remember reading this one two years ago, at least, so clearly someone isn't asking enough questions. Let's think of some new ones!

1. Do you consider Zach Braff a role model? What about David Schwimmer?

2. If you answered 'yes' to the previous question, do you think your girlfriend respects you?

3. Do you even have a girlfriend?

4. What kind of underwear do you prefer and why?

5. You do realize these questions (and your responses) are totally insignificant, don't you?

Stay tuned for more nonsense.